How to prevent body image issues in children and build lasting self-esteem

When do body image concerns begin?

When we think about body image struggles, it is easy to imagine teenagers or adults navigating self-esteem and identity. Yet research shows that these concerns begin shockingly early. Children as young as four already start to develop body dissatisfaction and associate certain body types with worthiness and acceptance.

A study published in the Journal of Eating Disorders (2015) highlighted that by the early years of primary school, children have already internalised the idea that being thin is linked with being happier, more popular, and more socially accepted. This mirrors findings from BMC Paediatrics (2003), which reported that primary-aged children not only expressed dissatisfaction with their own bodies but were also aware of weight-based teasing and stigma. More recent research in BMC Paediatrics (2022) has confirmed that these early beliefs are strongly shaped by environmental influences — what children hear from parents, relatives, teachers, and peers.

In other words, long before a child learns to read, multiply, or navigate the world independently, they may already have learnt that there is something “wrong” with their body.

What children absorb (often without us realising...)

Children are whole beings from birth. They are constantly learning, not only from what we say directly to them, but from everything they observe: the way we speak about our own bodies, the way relatives joke about someone’s appearance, the way adults comment on weight loss or gain in everyday conversation.

These subtle, often unexamined, messages reinforce the idea that there are “good” and “bad” bodies, and that one’s value is tied to appearance. Even comments we might think of as harmless (“You look so pretty in that dress,” or “Wow, you’ve lost weight, good on you”) teach children that looks are more important than qualities like kindness, curiosity, or effort.

How to prevent body image issues in children

Many of us grew up surrounded by these same patterns. As adults, we might carry our own body image wounds. The key to protecting the next generation is to consciously unlearn these habits and create new ways of relating to ourselves and others.

Practical steps we can take include:

• Rethinking how we speak about our own bodies. Children are deeply attuned to their parents’ self-talk. Instead of criticising ourselves (“I feel fat today,” “I need to get rid of this belly”), we can model self-acceptance and gratitude for our bodies’ functions.

• Avoiding appearance-based comments. Replace remarks about looks with recognition of effort, joy, or personal qualities. For example: “You worked so hard on that puzzle,” or “I love how creative you were in your drawing.”

• Challenging harmful jokes or comments. If a relative or peer makes a body-based remark, gently redirect the conversation. Children notice when we stand up for respect.

• Promoting body diversity. Share books and stories that depict a range of body shapes, sizes, colours, and abilities. Normalise difference as part of the richness of human life.

• Focusing on feelings and capacities. Children’s worth lies in who they are, not how they look. Instead of reinforcing appearance, we can reflect their emotions, their initiative, and their problem-solving.

Why starting early matters most

The first years of life are a powerful window for shaping how children see themselves. If we can nurture body acceptance from the beginning, we give our children resilience against the narrow ideals and pressures they will inevitably encounter.

As BMC Paediatrics (2022) emphasises, prevention is most effective when it starts young. Waiting until adolescence is too late, by then, patterns of self-criticism and comparison are already deeply ingrained.

By combining evidence-based understanding with respect and trust, we can create a different legacy. One where children grow up knowing their value is not defined by their body, but by the fullness of who they are.

A final reflection: Breaking the cycle for the next generation

So I invite you to pause and remember 👉 When was the first time you became aware that something about your body was “wrong”?

Your story matters. By reflecting on our own experiences, we can begin to break the cycle, giving our children the freedom to grow up free from body image issues in children and the shame many of us carried.

References

• Journal of Eating Disorders (2015). Body dissatisfaction, weight perception and dieting in early childhood and adolescence.

• BMC Paediatrics (2003). Body image and weight control in young children: associations with parental, peer and media influences.

• BMC Paediatrics (2022). Early influences on body image and the development of body dissatisfaction in childhood.